Keeping your head above water

How I wish I could tell myself, the self from a month or two ago, that today would be a better day. How I wish I could remind myself that there are days like today filled with infinitely more joy than suffering, if only we allow it space to enter. Somewhere in between pain and [...]

Where’d all the time go

At one point, I was an eight year old girl daydreaming about owning my own credit card (big mistake), having my driver’s license, and living near an art museum. Oddly enough, all of these dreams have come to fruition, but the heaviness I carried in my childhood heart found its way to stay throughout the [...]

Conditional love in the chaos of unfamiliar times

“What good is love if it’s toxic?” I ask my therapist. “Perhaps it’s not love that’s toxic, but the expression of it that is.” I used to think that unconditional love was the greatest love. To love someone regardless of any action they do even if it’s against you and to love them fully and [...]

The Isolation of COVID

We hail on recollection, memory guiding thought, thought guiding choice. When we look back at how we’ve learned to live, my mind struggles to accept that we are entering a new mode of life. The tensions between my expectations of the old while welcoming the new is causing a friction and dissonance in my life. [...]

Six Feet Apart

I’ve been hesitating on writing about this for a while, but I’ve been thinking about this collective traumatic experience we are all going through as the COVID-19 pandemic ensues. News articles and live streams of press conference briefings from state officials sit heavy with me as I lay in my bed in the morning. It [...]

The Novelty of Depression

Individualism is heavily present in Western culture. The American Dream is oriented around the idea that an individual’s hard work, perseverance, and goals can help them achieve anything. Whilst that idealist notion is possible for some, the American Dream isn’t easily accessible to all. I’ve been thinking a lot about the idea of “novelty” in [...]